Let Me Tell You a Story Read online

  ‘Jorik!’ she screamed, grabbing him by the ear and leading him back towards the Warden’s room.

  That night he came to me in my dreams. He was now the faceless monster chasing me down the corridors. All the doors were locked and I knew I couldn’t escape from him. He got closer and closer and closer until my nightmare woke up the whole dormitory and brought Matron rushing in. I dreamed it again, night after night. During the day I did everything I could to stay out of his way.

  ‘Here comes Jorik,’ Cesia began to whisper whenever he was near and I would try and find a place to hide from him until he passed.

  Cesia and Basia had warned me about him soon after my first encounter with him.

  ‘No one likes him. He’s not normal. Make sure you keep out of his way.’

  ‘Children like him don’t live very long,’ Basia had added.

  But the more I tried to avoid him the more I seemed to bump into him. Often it was after he had been punished that he would come roaring down the corridor to terrify the life out of me. He never missed an opportunity to bellow at me. He enjoyed seeing my frightened face and would bare his teeth and roar like a wild beast. But he also enjoyed hurting me. Whenever he saw me he pinched or kicked me even when he hadn’t been punished himself. He knew I would never tell on him because I was too afraid of what he would do later. Every time he hurt me I wished he was dead.

  Like everyone else in the orphanage, I dreaded Punishment Day. At five o’clock every Monday afternoon we were summoned by the clanging bell to line up outside the dining hall. We were all so scared that no one ever uttered a word. No one was ever sure if their name was on the list of those to be punished or not. So far I had managed to escape everyone’s notice and had not been punished but each week I shook with fright in case I would have to walk forward for a public punishment.

  When we were all assembled and standing in straight rows facing the raised podium at the far end of the room, the doors behind us were locked. Then after a long silence a short procession entered through the doors at the back of the dining room, climbed the three steps up on to the podium and took their places. The Warden, Mr Policky, always entered first, holding a little bell, followed by his deputy, Mr Mackiewicz. Matron would remain on ground level with us but she too was one of the judges. The Warden then stepped forward and gazed long and hard at us. Sometimes some of the younger children cried with fright and the Warden then looked at Matron who went and grabbed the child, dragged them to the front and made them kneel down on the floor in front of everyone until Punishment Day was all over.

  The Warden then rang his little bell and two of the older boys came in carrying canes and straps that were laid out on the table in front of him. The two boys stepped back, one on each side of the table, and the Warden slowly picked up each cane and strap and swished them one at a time in the air. We all had to watch and listen. After he rang his bell for a second time a third boy came in with the black crime book. The boy opened it and handed the book to the Warden. The Warden looked through it for a few minutes and then began to read out the names of all of the criminals for that week: the children who had been late for work; the children who had been disobedient or rude; the children who had stolen, and the children who had not worked as hard as they should. Every time a name was called, the child made their way to the front and climbed up the steps on to the podium. The Warden read out their crime, and then their punishment was shouted out so everyone could hear. If it was your first time you might be let off with a warning not to do it again. But if you had been called before then you were punished. We had to watch as some children were caned on their palms, others were bent over a chair and held down by the two big boys while the Warden beat them with a cane or a strap. If they screamed, they were given extra thrashes. I couldn’t bear to watch the punishments and sometimes I dared to shut my eyes and try to block the screams from my ears. It was so horrific it felt as if it was me that was being hit, and afterwards I couldn’t get the screams out of my head and the visions away from my eyes.

  But it was Jorik who suffered most and there was never a week when he wasn’t thrashed over and over again. He would be dragged howling and fighting to the front.

  ‘Jorik. Crime? Bed wetting,’ the Warden would bellow every week. ‘This antisocial behaviour will stop. You will be beaten every time you wet the bed. We will beat this antisocial behaviour out of you and we will go on beating you until it stops. Bend over!’

  Every week Jorik was thrown across the table, held down by the two boys and caned again and again across his bare buttocks, all the time begging for it to stop. As he raised the cane above his head, I noticed that the Warden always had a small smile on his face as if he was enjoying himself.

  I knew that I had to keep out of Jorik’s way on Monday evenings because he would want to get revenge for his beating. When he was being beaten, I felt a tiny bit sorry for him but later when he was roaring in my face, pinning me to the wall or hurting me I only felt sorry for myself and I hated him with all my heart.

  ‘Unser Führer! Sieg Heil!’

  Sometimes inspectors came to visit the orphanage. We knew when these inspections were going to happen because it was the only time we saw the Director, Dr Kempf. He stood on the podium in the dining hall and raised his right arm and saluted the Führer. Then, letting his arm fall, he looked across at us all, standing as still as statues and quiet as mice.

  ‘The time has come for another inspection from the authorities. They will be here to ensure you are learning how to be useful citizens. Some of you will contribute to the advancement of science. Others will go on to become citizens of the new Fatherland, the new Germany. Citizens with true blood, of pure stock, embarking on a journey to rid the world of cowards and parasites, racial poisoning and contamination.’

  I was surprised and very frightened when Dr Kempf sent for me. I had never seen him except on the podium and didn’t realise that he knew I was even at the orphanage. It was Matron who told me.

  ‘Renata, come here, please,’ she said, as I was making my way back to my chores after we had been dismissed from the dining hall. ‘I was just coming to look for you.’

  I followed her into her room, fearful and worried that I had done something wrong. She closed the door behind us.

  ‘Dr Kempf wants to see you this afternoon,’ Matron informed me. ‘You have to be presentable. Let’s have a look at you.’ She spun me round. ‘Your hair needs washing, and you need a clean dress.’

  ‘Why does Dr Kempf want to see me, miss?’ I asked.

  ‘You are a very lucky girl. You are to go to his house this afternoon and I will take you.’

  ‘Why? Have I done something wrong, miss?’

  ‘No, just wait and see. But you must make sure you behave yourself when you get there. Now go and collect a clean dress from the laundry, and wash and comb your hair. Be back here at one o’clock sharp. Make sure you don’t talk to anyone else about this. Do you understand what I’m saying?’

  ‘Yes, miss,’ I replied.

  ‘You mean, “Yes, thank you, miss,”’ she corrected me. At one o’clock I knocked at Matron’s door.

  ‘There you are,’ she said and led me to a sink in the corner where she washed my face and hands again and helped me into the clean dress and apron.

  ‘Let me look at you,’ she said. ‘Yes, you’ll do. Now, remember your manners, Renata, I won’t be having you let the orphanage down. If they ask any questions and you are unsure of the answer just tell them you don’t know. I don’t want you saying things that will get you or anybody else into trouble, including the orphanage. Do you hear?’

  She handed me my coat and then led me out of the office, through the building and out the front door. We went along the lane that I had only walked that morning to church but this time we went past the church before turning off along a pretty street with large houses on either side. She stopped outside one of the houses and knocked on the door.

  It was answered by a man in a g
rey-green uniform and Matron gently pushed me forward. ‘This is Renata. Dr Kempf is expecting her.’ She then turned away and started walking back down the street. The man shut the door behind me and took my coat before leading me into a room with soft rugs, beautiful furniture and colourful paintings on the wall. Three men sat facing the door in large armchairs. Two were soldiers wearing Nazi uniforms. Seeing them so close to me, I shivered and my heart began to beat very fast inside my chest. The third man was old and kind-looking with white hair and a friendly smile – this was Dr Kempf. I looked at him as he got up from his chair and patted me on the head.

  ‘This is Renata,’ he said to the other two men. ‘An orphan from the Skierniewice area. No parents around. I think you would agree that she has all the necessary qualities.’

  At first the soldiers didn’t say anything but remained seated, still staring hard at me. Then Dr Kempf made me walk around the room and the soldiers fired questions at me.

  ‘Where is your father?’ the first one asked.

  ‘He is in the Army, sir,’ I told him.

  ‘Your mother?’ asked the second.

  ‘I don’t know. Sir. I think she’s dead. Sir.’

  ‘Do you go to church?’

  ‘Yes, every week. Sir.’

  ‘Do you know what Germans think of Jews?’

  ‘They hate them. Sir.’

  ‘Do you hate the Jews?’

  ‘I don’t know. Sir.’

  ‘Do you like the orphanage?’

  ‘No. Sir.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘There aren’t any books to read. Sir.’

  ‘Can you read?’

  ‘Yes. Sir.’

  ‘Who taught you?’

  ‘Jadwiga taught me. Sir.’

  ‘Would you like to leave the orphanage and go to a home where there were lots of books – a nice German home?’

  ‘Oh yes, I would like that very much. Sir.’

  The soldiers looked at each other, smiled without smiling and came over to pat me on the head.

  ‘Charming,’ said one.

  ‘Good. Good,’ said the second and gave me a slice of cake. When I had finished eating, Dr Kempf led me out into the passage and helped me on with my coat and as he did so he dropped to one knee, so that his face was on the same level as mine. He looked into my eyes.

  ‘You did very well, Renata, very well,’ Dr Kempf said. ‘But tell me one thing, when did you last see your mother?’ His voice was gentle and his watery grey eyes looked worried.

  ‘Just before she was taken away by soldiers. Sir,’ I replied, repeating what I must have said a hundred times before, not thinking about its meaning.

  ‘Do you know where she is now?’ Dr Kempf asked.

  ‘No, Sir,’ I said. ‘She was taken away in a lorry to a camp, with my granny, Sir.’

  Dr Kempf paused and was just about to ask me another question when the man in uniform came back. Dr Kempf stood up, patted me on the head and asked the man to take me quickly and safely back to the orphanage.

  Chapter Eleven

  March 1944. Skierniewice to Warsaw

  Matron was back to being her horrible self again and everything was the same as before. I hoped what happened to Oliver Twist was going to happen to me. I would leave the orphanage and go and live with a lovely, kind lady and gentleman who would give me nice food to eat, a warm comfy bed to sleep in and lots of books to read. Then I would discover that they were my Mamusia and Tatuś, the same way that Oliver Twist had found his grandfather. But I didn’t hear anything else about me leaving Skierniewice and going to live in the house in Germany with the nice family. Perhaps I had dreamed the whole thing. Perhaps there had been no meeting, no cake, no kind Dr Kempf who had asked me about my mother. I had started to believe that I would have to stay at the orphanage for ever when Matron called for me once more.

  ‘Renata,’ she said. ‘You will be leaving us to start a new life. Tomorrow morning after breakfast I want you to put on these clothes and return your uniform to the laundry. Then you must wait in your dormitory. Someone will be along to fetch you.’

  She held out a bundle of familiar clothes – the clothes I had been wearing when I first arrived.

  The next morning I followed Matron’s instructions. I left the dining hall and returned to the dormitory where I quickly changed into my old clothes, which were much shorter than I remembered. But before I sat on the end of my bed to wait, I took the turnip, the one I had stolen only yesterday, and quickly placed it beneath Basia’s pillow. I returned to the end of my bed hugging myself at the thought of Basia’s delight when she found it this evening. It was my way of saying goodbye.

  I sat there for what seemed like hours and still no one came. After a while I began to panic. Perhaps I had misheard. Perhaps I had dreamed up the meeting with Matron, but I had the clothes. I was beginning to doubt myself and thought perhaps I was finally going mad like the other children in the orphanage. Then Matron entered the room.

  ‘Renata, there has been a change of plan. Here is your uniform. Put it back on and go and join the others scrubbing the long corridor.’

  I knew better than to ask what had happened. I did as I’d been told then went to join Cesia and Basia at their work, angry that I had lost my precious turnip for nothing. Swallowing my disappointment, I decided then that I would forget about my meeting with Dr Kempf and the promise of my new life with lots of books. He had seemed kind enough but after all, promises were never kept by anyone, were they?

  But a little later that morning, I was called for again. This time I didn’t have to change clothes, just make my way to Mr Mackiewicz’s office. There was someone who wanted to see me. I expected to find Dr Kempf or one of the Nazi soldiers who had shown so much interest in me a few weeks before, but to my surprise I found a lady with her back to me. I recognised the hair. That beautiful dark red hair. I would know it anywhere. My head went dizzy and my heart was beating so hard I thought it would burst. I wanted to rush into her arms and shout her name but Mr Mackiewicz’s eyes made me stay where I was, studying the floor.

  ‘Renata,’ Mr Mackiewicz said at last. ‘This is your cousin Frederika. She informs us that you are not an orphan after all. Now she has found you, she will be taking you to Kraków where she can look after you.’

  I looked up and saw Frederika turn towards me, a secretive smile on her lips.

  Frederika

  ‘Mr Mackiewicz, I would like a few moments with Renata, if that is all right with you,’ Frederika said and to my surprise Mr Mackiewicz agreed.

  ‘Renata, go to your dormitory and you may have a few moments there. Matron will be along to show your cousin the way out.’

  Frederika took my hand in hers and together we left the room. I couldn’t believe it. Frederika had found me at last. I said nothing. I just led her down the maze of corridors to my dormitory where we closed the door and finally Frederika swept me up into her arms and hugged me tight, kissing me and hugging me again. I felt my heart would break.

  ‘How did you find me, Frederika?’ I asked finally. ‘How did you know I was here?’

  ‘Jadwiga told me,’ she answered. ‘Jadwiga wrote and told me that she couldn’t wait any longer for the money. But it was so silly because I had already sent the money I owed and enough to cover the next two months. It must have arrived soon after she took you to the orphanage. In her letter she said that she had waited long enough already and that she had no alternative but to take you to the orphanage. But she said you would be properly looked after and given enough food to eat and a warm place to sleep. I was so relieved as it meant that you would be safe because being in a Catholic orphanage no one would ever suspect anything. It also gave me a little more time to get everything sorted out before I came to get you. Oh Renata, I am so sorry. If only I had known, I would have come sooner. I thought you were happy and well looked after. I never dreamed that you would be in a place such as this.’

  But I no longer cared. I no longer felt cold or hun
gry or alone. I no longer felt angry at giving my turnip away. Someone had been thinking of me and now I had been found – that was all that mattered.

  Matron appeared before we could say any more and Frederika regained her composure and, in a loud, calm voice, said, ‘I shall visit Renata again tomorrow, every day in fact until I have made arrangements for us to return to Kraków. It won’t be long, a few days at most.’

  I watched Matron’s face as Frederika spoke but Matron just nodded and stood back from the door allowing my cousin to pass.

  The next day I was allowed to return to the dormitory after breakfast to see Frederika again. We sat in each other’s arms on the end of my bed for a few precious minutes and I asked Frederika whether she had heard from my father.

  ‘No, my darling,’ she said, ‘I haven’t, but things are so difficult at the moment. I expect he is somewhere safe waiting for you.’

  Then there was silence; neither of us knew what to say, where to start.

  ‘Tell me a story,’ I said finally, breaking the silence. I just wanted to hear her kind, soft voice; it didn’t matter what she said.